I Need Therapy

Me: "Yes, I need therapy"

You: "Why"? 

Me: "Because I like you some of the time but most of the time I hate you and have fantasies about all the bad things I could do to you and wonder then if I would even feel guilty or if I would just laugh hysterically and feel as though I had just been let out of prison".

You: "I think most married people think the same thing sometimes, you don't really need therapy do you"?

Me: "Maybe you are right, I'd probably just end up with a 'new'one that I would have to learn to work with all over again".

You: "I know, I have a friend who is the sixth 'upgrade' after five failed ones".

Me: "That's stronger and tougher than I think I could ever be".

You: " I think this is the one though. I just feels right."

Me: "Really?, Maybe I should try the same thing".

You: "Well, you know, you have never been one to "rush" into things, but really, nearly everyone has left Vista behind".

Me: "Hummm, O.K., I'll try to calm down and load Windows 7 this afternoon."

You: "You know, everytime we have this conversation, you end up ripping my guts out".

Me:  "Yeah, I know, it's just that your basically flawed and when I get really really mad, I am 'driven' very, very slowly and then left frozen, so to speak, in desperation. So, this afternoon could be your last one. You are going to be upgraded to a trophy companion, so.....".

You: "Well, at least we got to spend all day yesterday together. Even though we didn't exchange any words, the emotion was clearly there".

Me: "That's what they all say...too much, to late...I hate it when you control me and then try to make me feel guilty."